He Said To Me

He said to me ....... I don't know why you wear a bra, you've got nothing to put in it.
I said to him ......... You wear pants don't you?

He said to me ....... Shall we try swapping positions tonight?
I said to him ..........That's a good idea - you stand by the stove & sink while I sit on the sofa and do nothing but fart.

He said to me ........What have you been doing with all the grocery money I gave you?
I said to him ......... Turn sideways and look in the mirror!

He said to me .......Why don't women blink during foreplay?
I said to him .........They don't have time.

He said to me ...... How many men does it take to change a roll of toilet paper?
I said to him ........ I don't know; it has never happened.

He said to me ...... Why is it difficult to find men who are sensitive, caring and good looking?
I said to him ........ They already have boyfriends.

He said to me ..... What do you call a woman who knows where her husband is every night?
I said to him ...... A widow.

He said to me .... Why are married women heavier than single women?
I said to him ...... Single women come home, see what's in the fridge and go to bed.
Married women come home, see what's in bed and go to the fridge.